Let’s all take a moment to virtually praise and thank whoever invented nipple shields. They’ve been around since the 1600s apparently, so whoever it was back in the day: you’re a legend. Nipple bearers in 2021 are still thanking you.
I think nipple shields are my new favourite object, probably in the entire world. Really, what can beat them? Dishwashers and vaccines are cool and all, but have you ever stuck a shaped piece of silicone over your nipple and then instantaneously stopped wishing it would fall off? This invention is a true miracle.
Last night was A Night to Remember and sadly not in a RnV way, but rather a “everything was going fine and then it wasn’t and now the worlds ending” kind of way. Breastfeeding, up until yesterday evening, was going very surprisingly well. It was painful, yes, but I didn’t feel too overwhelmed with it and it felt manageable. However, I think the past few days of cluster feeding all just caught up and what was Fine was suddenly excruciating and Very Not Fine, despite the latch being Fine. If you managed to follow all that, well done you.
So I didn’t cope with it all very well because it reminded me so badly of the few weeks of hell with my first and I felt doomed to that again. Luckily, my husband had an idea up his sleeve and came to the rescue.
It’s moments like these that remind me how lucky I am to have him. When contestants on Love Island say all they’re looking for is someone tall and with “good banter”, it makes me feel a bit sad. There are much more important things to value in my obviously very expert opinion of having been in a grand total of one serious relationship. Find a partner who will scour the whole region for nipple shields and who will perform German Christmas carols to distract you from the pain. After all, when it’s crunch time and you‘ve left the villa, this is the stuff that matters.
Anyway, now that the unsolicited relationship advice section of this ramble is over, let’s resume. At 9:45pm, my husband visited three different supermarkets, scanning each baby section in a feverish craze before the stores closed. Everywhere had sold out, like some cruel joke, and all the pharmacies were closed for the night too. But him being so wonderfully him didn’t give up and instead had a genius idea: why not phone a friend?
So he messaged his dad mates asking if any of them knew where to get the revered nipple shields at this late hour. Within minutes one of them had a genius idea too; the local maternity unit! You know, the place where we’d been just a few days earlier and where there’s usually a fresh babe or two? It’s funny what you don’t think of in the moment and then how obvious it seems after. So he called the unit and they said, “of course we have nipple shields lol” (okay they probably didn’t lol, but were definitely like “obviously we do?”). So then all I had to do was measure my nipple (one of the many, many strange things you might do postpartum), he picked them up from the duty midwife along with instructions and well wishes, and that was that.
When he arrived home from his big adventure I was a lowkey (read: very highkey) mess and was about 2.5 minutes away from sterilising all our bottles again. But instead we watched a very long-winded American lady on YouTube show how to pop on a shield. We followed her lead and holy mackerel this was a life changing moment.
Firstly, I didn’t expect it to work, you know, because I was doomed to the world and everything by this stage (wow aren’t I making you wish that you too could have a hearty swig of postpartum hormones too?). But it did. And secondly, I definitely didn’t expect the relief from the pain to be literally instant. Like the pain dropped from a 9 to a 1 with a click of my fingers/a pop of some silicone.
It was astonishing. I cried (though, when am I not crying lately?) because I was so happy, while eating m&m’s that these same friends who had the maternity unit idea, had dropped off earlier in the day. We are so lucky to have this village.
I know that nipple shields aren’t a permanent fix, but for the time being it will allow all of the harm to be healed, while still feeding the babe. What a win-win! It has given us so much hope and confidence that we can do this, that there are solutions and different options available so that you don’t have to suffer. Even if breastfeeding doesn’t work out in the long-term for us, for now it is, and for my husband and our friends, I am so grateful.
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