Skip to main content

The first day.

I survived!

My husband went back to work today and I managed to survive my first day alone with two under two. To be honest, it feels like quite an achievement. I didn’t even cry!


The day went surprisingly smoothly and it was actually quite nice to have a quiet day amongst everything else we’ve got going on at the moment. There was only one moment of true chaos, when both the toddler and the newborn cracked it at the same time, but we muddled through to the other side and lived to tell the tale.

These past few days have been hectic, even for us. Our house has become a revolving door of tradies, real estate agents, and very kind friends and family who are helping us to finish it off. Let’s just say that the sawdust to carpet ratio spread throughout the entire house isn’t pretty. But it’s getting done, somehow; it’s coming together. This afternoon I realised that we’re kind of doing exactly what I had hoped wouldn’t happen when we were planning everything; renovating hurriedly, buying, and selling, all with a one year old and a three week old. It’s A Time and we do not recommend it: I now understand why house renovations tend to happen over several years - you’ve got to have room to live sometimes too.

Alas, we’re surviving though and it’s really nice to see the house coming together and also to be shown that whether it’s enjoyable or not, I can cope with all of the things going on. It has all been a good confidence booster in a way, as well as a firm reminder that doing everything at once is silly. Future us - please listen to past us. Just because you can do all the things doesn’t mean you need to. Slowing down is our focus for this next season and I think it will take a bit of practice to learn to live without doing constantly.

So today was a very good day. I don’t want to get ahead of myself here because I’m sure that we’ll have plenty of days that swallow us whole and that we’re glad to see the back of, but today, the very first day, was good. Our toddler loved getting things for the baby, like a blanket and a nappy. She also liked to read books to the baby and pat her head. These moments make all the You’reBothCryingWhatDoIDo moments worth it. I’m feeling pretty lucky with these humans I get to love.

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

It gets easier (yes, yes it does).

Last night I had the privilege of reading this post by Emily Writes; a favourite author, advocate, and rebel of mine. And my goodness, her words rang true! When our toddler was about 6 weeks old, we were at one of our first Space sessions where lo and behold she screamed for most of the time. I was trying to hold back the tears as I watched all of my mum friends with their happy babies, seemingly having it all together and knowing what they were doing. I didn’t know why my baby screamed so much and why nothing I did would settle her. After cursing myself for leaving the house and swearing to never go back, I started talking to one of the session coordinators. She told me that she had four kids, much to my absolute horror in that moment. I had no idea how it was even humanly possible to cope with one child, let alone four! I felt as though I would be stuck beneath these tidal waves of desperation and drowning and just wanting it all to end, forever. I asked her how she did it, you know...
2 comments
Read more

Hand, foot, and mouth: an essay on depression during motherhood.

  “Ahh” the doctor said knowingly, as he peered into her mouth. “Looks like hand, foot, and mouth to me,” he then explained while examining her toes. “You’ll need to keep her home and away from everyone.” he concluded, handing me a prescription for more pamol with the cautious warning, “you’ll need it.” I used to think hand, foot, and mouth was something that only plagued unlucky sheep. However, toddlerhood has shown me that if there's a gross bug to catch, they will catch it. They just seem to lick everything in sight. This prognosis of having our usual routine disrupted made me feel a bit all over the place. // I feel dull. And dulled. Each day that stretches before me yawns, gaping, open, an unfathomable expanse of wondering how I’ll possibly cope. The clawing anxiety sets in too - if these days are long and heavy right now, how much more will they swell and expand in a few months time when my second baby arrives? Am I meant to feel this way? Maybe this is the united, fearful st...
3 comments
Read more

“Do you research” does not mean reading Facebook.

 Most days I come across yet another person I follow on Instagram having fallen deep deep into the whole anti-vaxx, anti-lockdown, scamdemic thing. And I’m just like you too mate? Yet another one bites the dust?  They all seem to have a few things in common. Largeish followings. White. Wealthy. Everyone close to them is healthy. Job title: influencer.  I can’t even with these people. They both shock me and appal me. And I just feel like they’re growing in number each day. Let’s just say I’ve been pressing the unfollow button a lot lately. Sometimes though I go back to visit their page a while later, just to see how deep down the fake rabbit hole they’ve fallen.  Wakeful babies give you plenty of time to scroll. I think it’s the shock value that makes me want to look again.  And each time I’m even more shocked and grossed out by their sheer lack of common sense alongside their cruelty towards literally anyone who isn’t them. So many of them have escalated beyond ...
Post a Comment
Read more